Kissing Grains Goodbye

Most everyone who keeps up with me in any way, knows that I have been implementing the Ketogenic Diet for the past 8 months.  I have lost 37 pounds and, most importantly to me, I have seen a marked improvement in some areas of my physical health that have caused me discomfort and sometimes even misery for many, many years.  It’s been life-changing for sure!

Over the course of these past 8 months of eating an extremely low amount of carbs, and having basically eliminated all consumption of grains from my diet, I have come to realize that grains have been the culprit of much suffering throughout my life.  I grew up in the Deep South, and I have always eaten a hugely grain-saturated diet:  corn, rice, and wheat out the wazoo!  Eliminating these things has promoted an overall healing in my body that I truly never believed would take place.  I have had stomach issues for my entire life, y’all:  gas, bloating, diarrhea, constipation, and yes even hemorrhoidal issues (which is an effect of many years of bowel issues).  I know that’s somewhat personal information…but health is personal!  If we don’t share our challenges and victories in these areas, no one will ever be able to benefit from our own trials and errors!  So…I’m not sorry for that little “overshare.”

Moving on though…

So how do I know grains are the problem?  Well, this leads me to a quick confession time.  Like I stated before, I’ve been on the Ketogenic Diet for quite some time now, (for more information on that, click here), but for the past two weeks I have not been a smart girl and I have had little bits of sugar and carbs here and there.  I kept thinking, “It’s not a big deal now that I am pretty much just in maintenance mode.”  However, it turns out that it is a big deal.  In these last couple of weeks I have consistently made small, yet impactful, bad decisions in my eating…and it’s been painfully clear that the common denominator has been…yep you guessed it…grains.  The process of elimination is a tried and true method for figuring things out in every aspect of life, and it is the number one way to find out an allergy or sensitivity on your own.  These two weeks have been eye-opening for me, and so here I come straggling down the road…a prodigal daughter…home…back to what I know is right for me:  grain-free.

When I began to realize that something I was consuming was actually harming me, I had to figure out what it was.  Was it sugar, or was it grains?  So, as I always do, I began to research.  First I looked into gluten allergy and/or sensitivity.  My findings were somewhat similar to what I was experiencing, but not quite the answer I was looking to discover.  I needed to know what would cause my:

• itchy, red patches of skin (eczema)
• cystic acne
• sinus congestion and drainage
• hormonal imbalance (unbearable periods and out of control PMS)
• bloating and water retention all over my body
• gastrointestinal upset
• fatigue
• mood changes (feeling depressed for no specific reason)
• unexplained physical pain (much like Fibromyalgia)
• migraines

So the next thing I researched was wheat allergy.  Again, not quite right.  So that’s when I came across resource after resource on grain sensitivity.  Ding, ding, ding!  We have a winner!  I was pleasantly surprised to find my perpetrator so quickly, but then I began to think about all of the foods I must eliminate for the rest of my life…if I truly want to feel well and truly thrive…and I must admit, for this foodie, it was somewhat depressing.  You see, when I began the Ketogenic Diet, I always had this mindset that I could reintroduce some foods once I’d hit my goal weight and made some great strides with my overall health.  I wanted to reset my body, and that’s exactly what I did.  I have learned so much about eating clean and how we truly are what we eat.  Going Keto taught me that.  Even if you don’t want to do the full-on Keto way of eating, I think it’s beneficial for everyone to limit carbs and to go organic!  However, I don’t think I realized (until now) what an impact grains had been having on my body all of my life.  They are not something that I can, in good faith, ever reintroduce into my diet if I want to feel great.  Admittedly, it’s kind of aggravating to know that there are some foods that I was raised on which are no longer options for me…unless I think it’s worth the havoc I know it will wreak on my system.  If I’m honest, I’m sure there will be times when I will falter, yet again, and put myself through unnecessary distress…but now that I am aware and certain, I will be making educated decisions about what goes into my body and how it will make me feel.  Ultimately, how I feel in the long-run is much more important than how I feel in the now.  

As always, I am sharing the resources that I found in my investigation.  I think it’s important to share, share, share when it comes to health education.  When we find something helpful, it’s almost immoral to keep it to ourselves…don’t you think?  So here are a few links to some articles that were interesting and valuable to me in my quest.

1. Grains Beyond Wheat
2. How do I know if I’m sensitive to grains?
3. Why Grains are Such a Problem
4. The Problem with Grains and Legumes

So, as I sit here writing this…a bloated, moody mess…with a residual stomachache and headache…with itchy skin…enduring PMS from hell…and trying to breathe through one nostril because of nasal congestion…I am reminding myself that today is a new day, and I am promising my body that I have hit my own proverbial “reset button.”  I am kissing grains goodbye, y’all.

If you are, or someone you know is, experiencing these same issues and you think it may be grains, I encourage you to do a little trial and error experiment of your own.  Take your health back…empower someone else to do the same!  Life is too important to spend it feeling like crap!

 As always, feel free to share!  Thanks, y’all!

Facing the Storm

While in conversation this week with my husband, just catching up from all the “stuff” going on, I noticed there’s so many life changing and significant things happening in our country right now. The obvious ones are the hurricanes (Harvey & Irma), but there’s also massive wildfires in several states, a huge earthquake in Mexico, I could keep going but you guys get the picture. We’ve got political junk going on, news media lying left and right, confused people causing and participating in riots….just lots of madness seems to be everywhere. There just seems to be this heavy fog or burden weighing us all down and that in itself can be exhausting.
However, the reaction of many great Americans last week in Texas was phenomenal, absolutely restored my faith in the people of this amazing country. People from all over the country sacrificing their time, money, resources and safety to rescue complete strangers is what makes me proud to be an American. After watching all these people pulling boat after boat to go save some people they don’t even know, I was ready to go borrow a boat and go down there myself!! All of it is so inspiring.

Just yesterday my husband was telling me about this neat meme he saw. F.E.A.R.- Forget Everything And Run or Face Everything And Rise……….did you goose bumps like I did? Now, don’t get me wrong there’s a time and a place for both of those. Most people should be forgetting everything and running from these hurricanes, but without those who rise and face it, so many more people, families and animals wouldn’t be alive today. With all the junk going on like I mentioned above, to still know there are good, noble, brave people out there makes me feel like it’s not as bad as it seems. We all have some good in us and it’s times like these that it shows.

This F.E.A.R acronym can apply to so many different situations and to all people. It could be a serious illness that you’re facing, or a failing marriage, maybe it’s severe depression, or just the stress of life. We all have to decide whether to forget and run or face it and rise. I hope I can always face it and rise when it’s necessary. Well, except for those times when we do need to run, like these hurricanes for instance.

I know this is a overly simplistic view, but it really struck a chord with me and I hope it does with you too. Be careful out there folks!

Waiting in the Dark

I wrote the following little nugget as a Facebook post on my personal page the other day.  Sometimes at night, I get these little revelations and tidbits from God and I just pop them up on my profile to share with my friends.  I decided I wanted to share this with my Nitty-Gritty readers, because several of my friends were blessed by it and shared it.  The purpose of Nitty-Gritty is to encourage other women in their journeys through life, so I thought this would be a perfect thing to share.

Imagine you’re standing in a dark hallway in front of a shut door and you’re knocking on the door…over and over you’re knocking…and it just never opens up. The hallway is so dark you can’t see your own hands in front of you, so you’re too scared to move from in front of that shut door that simply won’t open. You even try the knob and push against the door to see if it’s been left somewhat ajar, but it’s locked and won’t budge. You’re just stuck out in this black corridor…waiting. Then, waaaaay down at the other end of the hall, you see a sliver of light growing bigger and brighter. There’s a door down there…and it’s open wide! But…it’s unfamiliar…and it’s not the door you wanted to enter…it’s not the path you wanted to take. You have a choice, keep knocking in darkness, or start walking toward the light.

Sometimes you have to walk through doors that you never intended to open. Sometimes it’s intimidating, and not at all what you’d imagined. But that’s how God works. When He opens a door, He doesn’t leave it cracked…He swings it open wide…so that there is no mistaking that this is His way! What we have to then do, is remember to always follow His light…to just keep walking toward it. I can promise you this, He has never led me astray, not one time. Sometimes His way is harder. Sometimes His way requires that we give up what we desire. But we have to trust Him. Don’t stand in the dark, so focused on a shut and locked door that you miss out on the beauty that’s found in His presence…down His path. He is calling you today, out of the darkness, and into His marvelous light. Don’t miss out.

We all have those times of darkness that we go through in our lives.  We get stuck in the dark because we are so fixated on what we have created in our minds as the ideal.  We stand at the door of our hearts’ desires and we wait because we feel like that’s what we are supposed to do…wait.  Well, part of that is true.  The Bible tells us, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”  (Matthew 7:7-8, NIV)  

So yes, ask and seek.  Don’t give up on your dreams.  Keep knocking on doors, but keep your eyes peeled to what’s around you.  Have you ever been in a dark room?  At first you have to let your eyes adjust to it, but after a few minutes, you get used to it.  Just because you’re in the dark, doesn’t mean you’re blind.  You just have to be more alert and more aware.  It won’t be dark forever, and when you have that realization with you at all times, knowing that any moment a door will swing open and you won’t be in the dark any longer, well that is HOPE.  Hang onto that, and have faith in God’s promise to you.  Be willing to go when you have opportunities…even when they aren’t what you expected or even what you requested and hoped for…because that’s how God is…He is unconventional, creative, and He reaches out to us in ways that sometimes catch us off guard.  Remember, everything that we walk through, every dark hallway, is a part of something much greater than what we can see in the moment, but one day you will look back and know it was a necessary darkness…and you were simply waiting it out.  

“Death, where is your sting?”

This devotional was originally posted in my church’s blog, for which I am a contributing author.  I wanted to share it with my Nitty-Gritty friends, because there are so many of my friends and loved ones who are struggling with the loss of loved ones.  It’s one of the most difficult journeys that we take in life, and it is only by the comfort and peace of the Holy Spirit, and the hope we have in Christ, that we can make it through to the other side…where we are able to experience true joy once again.  I hope that it helps you, and I hope that if you know someone who is grieving, you will share this with them, and that it will help them also.

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(1 Corinthians 15:51-56, NLT) 51 But let me reveal to you a wonderful secret. We will not all die, but we will all be transformed! 52 It will happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed. 53 For our dying bodies must be transformed into bodies that will never die; our mortal bodies must be transformed into immortal bodies. 54 Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled:

“Death is swallowed up in victory.

55 O death, where is your victory?

    O death, where is your sting?”

56 For sin is the sting that results in death, and the law gives sin its power. 57 But thank God! He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.

From November 2013 through May 2014 was a very difficult time in my family.  We were faced with mortality and grief in various undesirable ways.  In November 2013, my grandmother passed away after suffering from a massive stroke that hit her three years prior to her death.  The following April, my grandfather (who had lived with Alzheimer’s Disease for 7 years) made his grand entrance into Heaven.  Then the very next month, my dad was diagnosed with advanced, rapidly progressing, Alzheimer’s Disease.  To say that we felt devastated doesn’t quite encompass the depth and magnitude of our anguish. 

I could write page upon page about the crippling effects of dementia (as well as other types of neurological diseases) on the victims and their families.  It is a certain, and often slow, death. 

And there it is, the thing we most fear will happen…death.  Our humanity causes us to accept death as final.  In our minds, it is the end.  When a loved one passes on, people tell you that it’s not goodbye…not the end…and you nod and feign your resolve and agreement, but in that moment the only thing that you can truly feel is the emptiness and pain left behind, and the only thing that you believe is that you’ll never see that person again.  We are humans, and to us…death stings. 

To us, death feels like a punishment, because we have to go without someone that we love…missing that person and holding fast to our memories, hoping to never forget anything.  In our grief, we are blinded by emotions and we forget the truth of God’s word about death.  We are hurting, so we don’t understand or remember that because of Christ we have a HOPE that goes beyond mortality. 

13 And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. 14 For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.  (1 Thessalonians 4: 13-14)

Though we can’t accept it in the hours of distress and pain, the truth remains that death is only temporary.  It isn’t the end for those who are in Christ.  Essentially, our mortal lives are but a progression toward our own individual appointed times.  So we have to get out of our heads when it comes to the dread and anguish associated with death.  Death has no sting or victory…not because we don’t have to experience it and deal with it, but because we have a promise that far outshines anything this life, this temporary existence that is riddled with heartache and difficulties, has to offer us.  This life is not purposed to benefit us.  It’s not about you or me.  Every moment spent breathing air is a gift…not because this life will be the pinnacle of your existence, because it just isn’t.  It’s but a vapor that lasts mere moments in the span of eternity.  It is a gift because we have been created and chosen to be a part of something bigger than ourselves…to live outside of our own needs and serve a purpose in God’s plan for humanity.  So when we have lived that out, when we have given our lives to Christ and done our best to serve God’s plan, we don’t have to fear what comes next.  We naturally miss our loved ones, but what purpose does it serve to give ourselves over to the emotions of grief, sadness, and distress? Having victory over death isn’t cheating death, because we don’t have that power.  The victory is in knowing that even when the wages of sin is death, we don’t have to pay that price because Christ did when He went to the cross.  His sacrifice gives us the victory that comes from not fearing our exit from this life. 

Watching someone that you love suffer through a disease is not easy.  I see my dad, who is reduced to the mindset of a young child…unable to care for himself…no longer able to think rationally and independently, and I hurt.  My humanity aches at the thought that soon we will no longer have him with us here at part of our lives.  Yet there is this other part of me, driven by the truth of God’s word…by His promises, that longs for the day when my dad is free from his humanity and transformed supernaturally into his heavenly body that will never die.  He’s earned that.

For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. (2 Corinthians 4: 17-18)

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Prayer:  Heavenly Father, sometimes our fears are born out of the unknown.  We don’t know what to expect out of death, other than grief, so we are fearful of it.  Help us to remember that mortality is but a present trouble.  Help us to fix our eyes on the unseen…the glory of Heaven.  When we are Heavenly-minded, we are able to see beyond the here and now.  When we fix our eyes on You and Your ways, we are able to move beyond our emotions and accept our human experience for what it is…temporary.  Thank you for this gift…for choosing us to live for this time.  Amen.

The Night Shift Family – Let’s Talk About That

So, I know this is sort of a different subject to focus on but, nonetheless, it’s something I feel the need to share about, to help others better understand the lives of a night shift family. I’m going to attempt to compare below the “normal” day-to-day happenings for day shifters and then night shifters in a sort of timeline fashion. Granted, there are always things that pop up and our schedules always get changed, but from my own life, and those of friends and family, this is a generic idea of what each shift would generally encounter through out a normal day.

Timeline for typical day shifters:

• 6:30ish– get up and get ready for work and school
• 7ish-breakfast and off to work
• 8ish– kids on the bus or take to school
• 8:30ish to 12ish-errands, grocery, play time, crafts or creative time, play dates, library, maybe the zoo (which includes picnic), really whatever needs to be done, probably coffee time, dr.appts., or maybe homeschool time if that applies.
• 12ish-lunch
• 1-2ish rest and/or nap time. Which is also rest time or catch-up time for mom
• 3ish-getting kids from school
• 4ish-getting homework going and getting things together for dinner
• 5-6ish– spouse home from work, dinner time and cleanup
• 7ish-family time or outside time, maybe a sports practice or household duty like cutting the grass, maybe an ice cream trip
• 8ish-winding down for the night and getting baths
• 9ish-bedtime for kiddos
• 9:30ish to 11:30ish-hubby and wife time (insert your own details here) lol
• 11:30ish and later-sleeping (hopefully)

 This is how a typical day runs for us:

• 7ish-getting up and ready for school and the day (all while being quiet as a mouse, dad is sleeping)
• 7:30ish-breakfast (again no dinging spoons on bowls or slamming cabinets-have to be quiet)
• 8ish-getting all the kiddos to school (unless some are too little)
• 9ish-quiet time, coloring, a cartoon or very quiet play and also getting small ones dressed for the day, oh and don’t forget coffee time! Or maybe homeschool time if that applies
• 10-11ish– real quick errands or a fast grocery trip, also could be homeschool time
• 12ish– lunch and wake spouse up
• 1ish-household stuff like cutting grass, garden, laundry and loud cleaning like vacuuming and dishes, things that are too loud in the mornings.
• 2ish-try to spend some family time, try to catch-up on schedule details and family plans since we haven’t got to speak to each other since the day before around this same time. (usually nap time for smallest)
• 3ish-start dinner and get kids from school at 3:30
• 4ish-sit down for dinner and start cleanup; spouse starts packing lunch for work and getting ready (sometimes there is sports practice and I eat later and hubby leaves before I get back)
• 5ish-spouse leaves for work; me and kids start homework
• 6ish-sports practice and/or game, finish homework
• 7ish– outside time, play time and snacks
• 8ish-start baths and house cleanup
• 9ish– getting everyone in bed. Takes 30-40 minutes for just one person, some nights longer.
• 9:45-11:30– quiet time for me..usually paying bills, maybe a Netflix show or finishing tasks around the house
• 11:30ish and later-hopefully sleeping

I know the schedules may not seem much different from one another, but this is really a day in the life of a night shift family, with each parent working separately on different ends of the clock. All the while, I juggle kids, dinner, messes, homework, sports, baths, bedtime, etc.  My poor husband is sleeping or working while all this hustle and bustle is going on, and he knows he’s missing out on some great stuff…but he does it for our family. I know some who would say, “Why go to such lengths of being quiet?” or, “Why cater to when he’s getting up?” My answer is, would you want your spouse only getting 3 or 4 hours of sleep a day? Which leads to awful health issues later like high blood pressure, diabetes, and eventually heart disease…and don’t forget…feeling like crud as well.  My job is to ensure the health and safety of my whole family and that includes my husband too.

I said all that to say, we night shifters want “play” time or “talk” time too, or would like to socialize with friends, but when we’re able to do that most of our friends are at home with their spouses having dinner and having family time of their own. If I called to talk at 7 or 8 on any given night you probably wouldn’t answer because you’re spending precious time with your family, just like I’m doing for a precious hour or so earlier during the day. And let’s not forget my school aged children only see their daddy for about an hour when they get home from school, and that time includes sitting down for dinner and my husband getting ready for work. The weekends are absolutely sacred to us.  We have just a couple days with a few hours to focus on our family and try to makeup for almost zero (whole) family time we get during the week. By God’s grace, and by keeping our family centered in Christ, we have been able to handle this way of life for 16 years now.

I’m not saying us night shifters have it harder really, but there is some extra responsibility that falls on us and that’s ok, that’s how families work…we work together. I can only imagine how a single parent feels and the lengths they go to, to try and cover the roles of both parents. So, if you’re a day shifter have a little grace for those who have to do life a little differently. Try to put yourself in their shoes and imagine how it would be. Don’t assume they’re too busy for you or have new friends…just realize they’re doing life the best they can.